Friday, November 30, 2007

Catching up

Been a while since i blogged. It seems i'm busier than i used to be. It feels good to be active again. Its almost like being part of society and not just in the cancer world.

Update on health......I went in to the Lymphedema clinic to have my arm measured. Before i started radiation i had my arms measured. Sometimes rads can cause lymphedema. Luckily it didnt for me. Maybe it was due to my walking everyday, or drinking lots of water, not being overweight, who knows, ....maybe i just got lucky. I still have to be careful. I can get lymphedema at any time for the rest of my life. Knowing that causes me to be more aware of what i'm doing and eating. I'm not so sure thats always a good thing. I feel i'm more intuned to my body, which i appreciate. I just don't want to stress over the little things. I thought i was doing pretty well with that aspect of it. I ate pretty much what i wanted to, adjusting salt or having smaller amounts, drinking water, walking a lot. After i got measured i found out i have some swelling under my arm. Not lymphedema thankfully, but the early signs of what could be. I went into the clinic today for a lymphatic massage. I'll be getting about 4 sessions total. They are going to try and reduce the swelling and also wake up the other lymph areas of my body. Maybe they can take up the slack that the missing lymphs cant. I am also going to learn how to do some lymph work on my own.

The session was very relaxing, like a regular massage, but different.

Other than that i have some pain and tightness in my arm and chest area. could be due to the swelling or radiation side effects, not sure.

I made a big decision as well. The idea was for me to have a hysterectomy on Dec 12th, then go to London for new years. The more i thought about that i realized that wasnt going to happen. What was i thinking? I get exhausted normally when i go overseas by the jetlag and long travel time alone, then i would add recovery from a major surgery and being thrust into menopause?

I can see it now. Theres me waving my arms around and screaming at someone due to the hormones swirling around my body, and then drinking too much to compensate, they'd have to land the plane in Ireland and protect the other passengers. No....not a good idea. I'm not super woman. Although sometimes i wish i could fly away on a moments notice.

So, i've decided to have my surgery in January. I checked with my Oncologist and he gave me clearance. He told me that the chemo was supposed to kill the aggressive cancer cells and that getting rid of the estrogen sooner rather than later is a good idea for the long term. To wait just a month or so would not(should not) make a difference. I was looking at my life this year and how many times i've said no to people, not being able to do things, go places. I was diagnosed January 26th, nearly a year now. I want to have some fun! I didn't want to say, one more time, i'll go to london next year. What if, goddess forbid, i have a recurrence next year? Then i wouldnt be going to london most likely. I have to live for now. I also want to be somewhat realistic and do what my docs say, so after getting clearance i booked my flight!

I'm going to London for christmas and new years!!

I can't wait! I'll go and have fun, then come back and have my surgery and be able to recover properly without having to go anywhere, just tuck in to a cold winter in maine, and heal. Get ready for spring.


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