Thursday, December 10, 2009
I can't believe it's been so long since I've posted here.
I am doing my best to try and get into the holiday spirit and not having too much luck.
I really don't like the holidays too much. Growing up it was always stressful and not much has changed. I never have enough money to buy presents for people, no matter how crafty or economic I try to be. I love being able to buy gifts for the people I care for but when it feels "forced" then it gets all crazy.
I've never been a real crafty-type person. I've learned some skills over the years but never felt like I was that good at it and it didn't give me much joy. I told myself that "This year I'm going to make things for people!". Hasn't happened and its two weeks till Christmas.
It's not going to happen.
There have been some illnesses and death lately. That doesnt help either. November seems to always bring bad news.
My Osteopath that I see said that about 80 percent of her clients lately are not in the spirit either and she wished that we could have an alternate world where the people who didn't like the holidays could go and the people who DO like the holidays can go to another world. Sounds good to me.
I DO like some things about the holidays. Some of the Christmas movies are sweet and nostalgic. The good foods that are made at parties are fun. Some of the music is sweet. I especially love A Childs Christmas in Wales.
The overall emotion at this time of year is heavy and sad.
The commercials on t.v. remind me of things I don't have in my life. That special someone to share memories with. The inability to buy the gifts I want to buy for people. So on and so forth. It's all just so depressing and I look forward to December 26th. New Years Eve doesnt seem to bother me too much. Sure it would be nice to have someone to kiss at the stroke of Midnight but I am mostly o.k. with that. It passes pretty quick.
I know this post is un-festive and depressing.....but I figure I'm not alone. There are many people that are lonely this time of year.
I guess I'm one of them.