Saturday, July 19, 2008
Well, i've poked my head out of the water and am swimming the doggy paddle.
The dark cloud has lifted.
We had some nasty thunder storms yesterday. I was on my way to an appointment when I had to wait for the storm to pass, stop what i'm doing and wait. It seems similar to when I get hit with some serious depression symptoms. I just have to wait it out.
I saw Batman last night, the new one with the late Heath Ledger and the beautiful sexy Christian Bale. It was amazing! I can see why Heath is getting some Oscar nomination nods. He's incredibly scary and disturbing. The movie was very dark and intense, but so well done that you just have to watch it all. The acting was so well that it almost became real, thats when you know you are transformed as a viewer, when a movie can almost make you believe that what you are seeing is really going on. Love that!
I've been running around all week, started a neuro rehabilitation program due to the chemo messing around with my brain and cognitive functions. I am also going to start a new therapy group and see a new counselor to also help with some skills I am lacking, to hopefully get me back to work or school.
I am reminded that I am still in recovery. All the running around lately has really exhausted me. I have some more running around to do today but its fun running around, not tedious like this last week. Sunday I should be able to mostly take the day off and chill.
I look back at what i've accomplished this week and am still amazed that it could wear me out so much.
I could let that depress me and I could easily go to a place where I felt sad that i'm not up to par quite yet, but I am trying not to.
I want to give myself a break and realize that next thursday will be my one year anniversary of stopping chemo treatment, but it wont be till october 5th when I will have been finished with radiation treatment for a year. It takes some time to get back to feeling more energetic.
I just need to keep reminding myself of that.