Wednesday, December 5, 2012


Hi ya'll!

I had meant to post much sooner than this. I hope there are still some readers out there. :)

So, whats' been happening with you all?

I had a lovely Thanksgiving with my mom, stepdad, brother and his two boys. My mom made a healthy not too overwhelming yummy meal. One thing that I love she made even though she can't eat it due to her allergies. She must love me huh? Sweet Potato Pudding. Yum!!

I got to spend a little alone time with my oldest nephew and that was so special to me. I gave him some pics of him when he was a baby in NYC. He had a smile from ear to ear looking at them. Made me so happy. His little brother is getting a lot of attention lately due to being diagnosed with Aspergers. I wanted so much to let my oldest nephew know that he is special too and that I see him. Really see him.

Its hard to think about how that was my last T-giving, my last birthday in October, now my last Christmas and New Years. I'm tired of the "lasts".

I really DO try to focus on being in the moment and not trying to make anything super special just because it may be my last whatever. I think if one forces things to happen, they really don't come out the way that you planned. Sometimes the most magical moments happen when you least expect it. I just try to stay open to receiving them and letting them happen.

Last Sunday I was in NH visiting my dearest Nancy for the weekend, and we had brunch with a bunch of wonderful ladies I hadn't seen in quite some time. One of those ladies is a bit older than me and very "tuned-in". What do I mean by tuned in? Well, she is a person who seems to be sensitive to energies around her including spirits who have passed. She also communicates with animals. She makes extraordinary jewelry as well. We were all saying our goodbyes in the restaurant and she hugged me and started singing in my ear. "All will be well.....etc...." and when I looked at her she kept singing and I just started crying. In the restaurant. At first I was self conscious and wanted to stop it all, but then I quickly, I am going to let this happen however its meant to happen. I ended up releasing tears that needed to come out. Didn't matter that we were in public. It was a special moment I won't forget.

Ok, so now to the yucky part....whats going on with me physically?

After I got back from my weekend away, Monday morning I felt like someone had ran over me with a truck. Ok, I exaggerate a bit. But wow, it was extreme pain. I couldn't seem to get rid of it. No matter what I did. By the time I was getting ready for bed I started to feel a bit better.

I woke up Tuesday and the pain was definitely less. But....I got a cold. Damn!

I am pretty sure its just a simple cold and will be gone in no time. My fear is it will travel to my lungs and so forth....I'm going to focus on it going away. I'm taking all kinds of things (natural) to help move it along. Fingers crossed.

I was told by my hospice nurse that if I have a lot going on one day that I may need to recover for a day or two. Now I get what she was talking about. WOW-ser!

I really thought I was taking it somewhat easy in NH but apparently not. I got to play with a seven week old puppy and that was so much fun and a bit exhausting but worth it. I love being at Nancys little red cottage in the woods. She has a wood stove and on Saturday it was snowing, so we sat by the warmth and watched the snow fall. So wonderful.

Again.....I wonder if its the last time I will be there. I hope not.

So, my message today is so cliche' but so true. If you can somehow imagine that this may be the last time you get to do something that you love, then take it ALL in, drink it in fully. Appreciating the moments as they unfold before you.

Blessed Be to All!


Anonymous said...

Blessed be to you too Jenn! Thanks for sharing. :-) -Love Larry

Anonymous said...

Lovely words, Jenn. You are such a good writer. Love, Ellis