Day Twenty One

I'm so glad the day has come where i'm into the 20's. I wasnt sure it would get here. Day 21.

Late today, had to take the bus. People coughing, sneezing. Cold season starts again. I'm especially sensitive to noticing sick people. I was told to watch it around the infected while i was on chemo. I still wash my hands pretty regularly. My system is vulnerable now due to the stress its under. I really dont want anything to stop me from getting the treatments. My goal is October 5th and i'm going to keep it.

The radiated area is very pink now. Rashes and burns that itch and sting. There are distinct patches of pink where the area of treatment is. Before i couldnt tell exactly where they were treating. Now theres no question.

Last night i noticed the right side of my throat was sore. The nurse had asked me the other day if i had a sore throat and at the time it wasnt so noticable. Last night it was. I'm sure they will tell me that its "normal". None of this experience is normal. Normal is relative i suppose.

I bought a beautiful red/green bell pepper and small butternut squash at the farmers market today. I had just enough money. Love it when that happens. Its squash time again. Soon you'll see soups on the menus more, and stews. All the fall foods are being harvested. I thought of something the other day. If i had chosen not to go through treatment or if i didnt find the lump, i may not be here now to enjoy the fall. I'm glad i am still here. Even if it means i face another Maine winter.

I need to research what foods i shouldn't eat if i dont want to add to the estrogen levels in my body. Yams are one of them, and its too bad cuz i love sweet potatoes. i need to do some more inquiry.

I'm at the cafe i like to go too on some wednesdays before an appointment. I was thinking about my sodium intake and wondering how much sodium is in those little creamers for coffee.

I believe cancer can age a person. I feel older. I'm one of "those people" who orders decaf, watches her sodium intake, and so on. I remember being younger and living life more impulsively. I didnt worry so much about the things i do now. Now i'm so careful. Maybe i can change that someday soon. I dont want to be one of "those people" who doesnt live life to the fullest as the cliche' goes, i want to live life at least 1/2 full.

I wanted to also say a big THANK YOU to my friend Jim for helping me put away my a/c, what a pain....couldnt have done it without you, thank you!!!

Only 12 more to go!